My Story

Preface

 

All families have stories. This is about my family's story. And first... a word about my inspiration for beginning to write my chapter.

 

My Pop and Gibbons immigrated to the United States years ago when they were young adults. They both emigrated from Ireland but met here New York. The married and began their family story here.

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Their eldest daughter is my Aunt Mary Anne. Aunt Mary Anne has stories to tell and is truly the family historian. Whenever I have questions about how I am related to one of my hundreds of second and third cousins, I know she will have answers for me.

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Years ago Aunt Mary Anne asked her Dad Martin, my Pop, to write his story. She coordinated with her cousins to get each of Pop's brothers and sisters, my great aunts and uncles, to also write their chapters. The chapters submitted on scraps of paper and audio recordings were painstakingly compiled into what we call "The Gibbons Clan" story. My Aunt Mary Anne tells me she wants her and her siblings to write their chapters and I so hope they do. My uncles Mike, Paddy and Rich and my aunts Mary Anne and Kathleen have led amazing lives and I would love to hear all of their stories. And my Dad... my Dad has stories to tell. I know many of them. And he is writing his chapter as I write mine.

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My Aunt Kathleen, the youngest of my Dad's siblings is in hospice. She is a beautiful soul who has the deep wisdom of a child. She was born with Downs Syndrome. We all love her fiercely. And she will be loved always even from the great beyond some day.

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My Pop Gibbons and all of his siblings are now in the great beyond. They are loved and missed and honored always. I have stories to tell about Pop and Gram Gibbons and I will get there. But first I want to write about what I am coming to learn, at the tender age of 46,  about life and death and love and family...

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Where my chapter begins

 

We all know that part of this beautiful life is knowing that every one will someday die. Its the terrible beautiful undeniable truth. So we strive to live life to its fullest. I want to tell you first about my Mom who knows a thing or thirty about living life to its fullest. 

 

Barbara Ellen Gibbons? My Mom? She truly lives and loves and what I have always admired about her how she is a Woman of Impact. My Mom has impacted and continues to impact the lives of SO many people.

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But first lets go back to Mom's beginning as I know it...

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Woman of Impact: My Mom as a child, a young woman, and an ever youthful Mom, Mother-in-Law and Mimi

 

My Mom was first the second daughter of Joe and Betty Putera. She was born on February 5, 1952. My grandma Betty told me that she was still pregnant with my Mom when she and my Pop Joe were building the house where they would raise their kids. Oh Pop was so proud of that house! And of his girls! And he was a downright nutbag. Suffered from severe PTSD having survived the horrors of World War 2. He may have been a little "crazy" but the good parts of his crazy were so good. He imprinted on my Mom and her sisters their love of art and music. And I believe the family creativity came from Pop. My Mom and her sisters are all EMPATHS and highly creative each in their own way. More on empathy and creativity another time...

 

 Then she was the protector and best friend of her younger sisters Lee and Steph. We don't really know what was up with big sister Janie. (Cue the song from the Disney animation Encanto "We Don't Talk About Bruno"...) Let's just say she was a tortured soul and may she rest In peace. 

 

Then at 14 years old Mom met my Dad. The handsome devil Thomas John Gibbons, son of Martin and Agnes Gibbons. Those crazy kids ended up marrying right out of college and started popping out kids right away. Seriously they got busy right away. I was born 14 months after they got married. 

 

They began what I affectionately call the Gibbons 5 - my mom and Dad and then me, my little brother Matthew Joseph and our youngest sister Julie Elizabeth. They made life so good for us. They were both teachers, with mom staying at home with us and not returning to teaching formally until I was in 4th grade.

 

We didn't have much money. But we were rich in all that matters. So much love and laughter and beach trips and summer camps and pool trips to the Dreylings and huge family dinners at cousins and Aunts and Uncles houses and oh so many things money can't buy...and mistakes and learning from those mistakes... all that matters.

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The Gibbons 5 grew. My sister married the rugged Gareth Peter deKlerk in 2006. They have 2 beautiful children living, James Nicholas (11) and Emily Megan (8). Then my brother Matt struck gold when he met Jennifer Oliver Krasinsky on a subway in Manhattan and they took a chance with one another. They are the definition of opposites attract but they make it work. Their bringer of light son Lucas Samuel (8) arrived just 2 months after my sister Jules had Emily. Then out of left field, I decided to chose the least conventional path and become a single mom by choice. (This means I worked with doctors and an anonymous donor to conceive my son without an "official" partner.) My son who carries on the Gibbons family surname (fancy that - born to a lesbian) is Thomas Flynn Gibbons (6).

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Woman of Impact: Mom as a Teacher, a Principal and a Mentor in the Education System

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My mom built her career in education. From Immaculate Conception School in Spotswood, NJ to Judd School in North Brunswick to North Brunswick High School, to Franklin Park Elementary - geez I am losing track! Let's just put it this way, if we were to gather all the students, teachers and faculty whose lives have been impacted by my Mom? We could probably fill Giants stadium... and that is likely an understatement. I'd be set for retirement and then some if I had a dime for every time someone who has met Mom in this education sphere has told me how much my Mom has impacted their lives for the better.

 

Technically my Mom "retired" in 2015 but teachers never truly retire. She got a gig at PSA in NJ mentoring school principal's younger in their career. She teaches her 4 grandchildren. James, Emmy, Lucas and Tommy are blessed to have her. And she never ever stopped modeling what it means to live and grow and be curious and open minded and self reflective to her own 3 kids.

 

Jules, Matt and I are ever blessed.

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To be continued...

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- Written lovingly by Megan Irene Elizabeth Gibbons